Managing Expectations: How to Determine If Your Standards are Realistic

One of the most valuable lessons I’ve learned in business is the importance of slowing down. One of the hardest realizations I faced was that, while I tend to perform at a high level, not everyone operates the same way. I’m not being arrogant, and I know my performance wasn’t always perfect, but I had a certain standard that I expected everyone to meet. What I struggled to understand at the time was why it wasn’t possible for others to work at that same pace or with that same intensity. My high expectations sometimes felt overwhelming or even intrusive to those seeking a balanced workday. I’ve come to realize that casual conversations, like those around the water cooler, are often a way for employees to take a break and socialize, which is essential for maintaining balance during the day.

It’s also important to recognize that deadlines and expectations can vary, and comparing employees’ performances—or even your own—based on speed and efficiency can create unnecessary pressure. This can lead to disengagement and distance between you and your team, ultimately hindering their growth and trust in you as a leader. Effective leadership involves understanding that each individual works differently and ensuring that expectations are fair and supportive of long-term success.

Throughout my career, I’ve experienced times when I pushed my team to meet performance levels I thought were reasonable, only to realize that what seemed reasonable to me wasn’t what they needed. So, where’s the balance? That’s the million-dollar question. Striking the right balance means listening to your team, adapting your approach, and fostering an environment where performance expectations are aligned with both the company’s goals and the well-being of the people who make those goals possible.

Adapting as a leader involves being flexible, self-aware, and open to change in order to meet the needs of your team while still achieving your goals. Here are some ways to adapt effectively:

1. Listen actively: Take the time to really understand your team’s feedback, concerns, and suggestions. Encourage open communication and create a safe space where employees feel comfortable sharing their thoughts. Listening gives you valuable insight into what they need to succeed.

2. Be empathetic: Recognize that everyone works differently, and not all team members will thrive under the same conditions. Show empathy by considering their individual strengths, challenges, and personal situations. This helps you tailor your approach to fit their needs while maintaining productivity.

3. Set clear, flexible expectations: While deadlines are important, allowing some flexibility in how tasks are accomplished can make a huge difference. Focus on the outcomes rather than dictating a rigid process. Be clear about the goals but flexible on the methods to let your team find their own ways to perform best.

4. Give autonomy: Micromanaging can lead to frustration and disengagement. Trust your team to take ownership of their work, make decisions, and manage their time. Autonomy empowers people and shows that you have confidence in their abilities.

5. Adjust based on performance: Pay attention to how your team responds to different workloads or strategies. If something isn’t working, be willing to pivot. Regularly evaluate how your management style impacts the team’s performance and morale, and make changes when necessary.

6. Foster continuous learning: Encourage your team to grow by providing training, resources, and opportunities to learn new skills. Similarly, as a leader, be open to learning and evolving your own management style based on feedback and new challenges.

7. Promote work-life balance: Recognize that burnout can undermine performance and lead to disengagement. Adapt by setting realistic expectations, respecting personal time, and encouraging a healthy work-life balance.

By embracing adaptability, you can create a dynamic, supportive environment where your team feels empowered, engaged, and capable of reaching their full potential.